Today, I want to share something special. Most of the feedback I receive as a coach comes from parents, educators, or other adults, and it’s always valuable, of course, but now and then, a young person says something that stops you in your tracks.

Earlier this week, I was wrapping up a session with one of my primary school coaching clients. Just before we finished, they began talking about how the coaching process had helped them. Without wanting to interrupt, I quickly hit record on my phone. With full parental permission, I’m sharing their words below, unedited apart from the ‘umms’ and ‘ahhs’.

Their experience speaks for itself.

A CHILD’S COACHING EXPERIENCE

‘I feel like I’ve changed a lot from before I saw Roy for the sessions to now because back then I didn’t really want to share how I felt, and now I’m here at this point, it’s so much easier and I feel like I’ve grown in confidence because I was definitely a lot more shy before we were having these sessions.

‘I started coaching when I was going through a lot in school. I was going from Year 3 into Year 4. It wasn’t my best year. It made it easier to go through it when I had someone else to talk to, not just parents, and I think it really helps having people outside of your family to talk to.

‘With my age now, going into Year 6, I feel that your emotions are stronger and your mind and body are changing. You’re getting more emotional. It’s a big jump from Year 3 and 4 because you’re still really young then. I don’t know if anyone really expresses their emotions in those years. In year 5 and 6 you need the help to get through it without too many issues.

‘I don’t really know what I had in me. I felt horrible in Year 3 and what’s really helped is that I know I have grown in confidence, and even if Year 6 is horrible, I can handle it. I’ve changed. My mind and body are in the routine of becoming more organised and less stressed.

‘Coaching is really good for your mind, especially if you can’t get to sleep that well because the next day in school then won’t be good and you’ll be thinking about so much stuff that you won’t have time to actually talk about it. It’s good to talk to other people.

‘I was going through so many emotions without really realising it and I didn’t really say about it because I was keeping it inside me. I have grown in confidence. Sometimes sessions end up being on a day where you’re not feeling the best or it happens the day before something big. It helps knowing that you’re having your own time with someone else to help you. With school, the teacher can’t always stop just for you, but the highlight for me with these sessions is being free to talk.

‘I would say to anyone that if you have any problems or things on your mind, or you’re anxious, you would really enjoy working with Roy because he would make sure you are allowed the space and the opportunity to say what you need to.

‘These sessions in a word are relieving. It’s relieving to have someone by your side to help you through the weeks and the help is just enough to give me chance to think between sessions.”

Why Coaching Matters, Especially Now

We are seeing an emotional health crisis unfold among children and young people in the UK.

According to a recent report from The Guardian, 28% of secondary school pupils avoided school at least once last year due to anxiety.¹ That figure is even more alarming when you consider that these are just the children who made it to the point of reported absence.

Many more children are silently struggling, attending school but coping poorly, internalising their distress, or masking until they’re behind closed doors. This is particularly true for children experiencing Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA), anxiety, or low self-esteem.

Coaching, particularly creative, consistent, and emotionally safe coaching as in the cast of the young client above, can make all the difference.

The Benefits of NLP Coaching for Children

I’m an NLP Practitioner and sometimes people ask ‘How on earth can NLP help children? Isn’t it really aimed at adults?’ Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is often misunderstood as a tool for adults, but it’s incredibly effective with young people.

Here’s how NLP coaching can benefit children:

• ✅ Emotional Regulation – Teaching children how to notice, name, and navigate their emotions
• ✅ Confidence Building – Reframing internal narratives to support resilience and self-worth
• ✅ Improved Communication – Helping children articulate their feelings and needs clearly
• ✅ Stress Reduction – Tools and language patterns that reduce overwhelm and promote calm
• ✅ Empowerment – Supporting autonomy and decision-making at an age-appropriate level

What’s especially powerful about coaching in a school-age context is the ability to meet children where they are emotionally, not just where the curriculum or timetable says they should be.

Why Consistency Counts

One-off interventions can be helpful, but real transformation comes with consistency. Coaching is not about a single ‘breakthrough moment’. It’s about ongoing, safe, non-judgemental support that allows a child to grow over time. Some of my clients do indeed have a small block of sessions, but many remain for some time seeing the benefit of ongoing support.

Children thrive when they know they have a regular space to talk, explore, reflect, and reset, especially when that space is led by someone outside their family unit, who is there just for them.

The child who gave the testimonial above began their coaching journey unsure, anxious, and self-critical. With consistent support, they grew into someone who now recognises and manages their emotions, and trusts themselves to handle what’s ahead. Personally, having gone from a child who struggles to express their emotions to giving a deeply passionate testimonial like above, really proves the benefit of coaching.

But then, it’s not just coaching, is it? It’s lifelong skill-building.

Final Thoughts

If you’re a parent, educator, or professional working with children, and you’ve noticed a child withdrawing, struggling with transitions, or expressing anxiety, coaching may be the missing piece.

I work with children and families every week to reduce anxiety, rebuild confidence, and help young people return to school with the tools they need to thrive, not just survive.

You can find out more about my work here: www.roypeach.com

¹ Source: The Guardian, Feb 2024